Welcome.

I'm so happy you're here.
Here is my story, the long version: 

The experience of being sick with chronic pain and physical symptoms is the best thing that ever happened to me. Because it set me on a journey of awakening that I probably would not have taken otherwise.

My whole life I had an interest in spirituality, even though I did not have a particularly religious upbringing. Our family went to a Methodist church occasionally, here and there, always on Christmas and Easter. My dad had been raised strict Catholic and wanted nothing to do with that anymore. My sisters and I were baptized in a Catholic church but after that, my dad left all that behind. He didn't want us growing up with the idea of sin and punishment and hell, which he said was all man-made make-believe stories to keep people in fear. We went to a Methodist church because our mom & dad  - who were very young and liberal - wanted us to have some kind of introduction about the idea of God without all the rules. The lessons I remember most as a child from our parents were about being a good person, being kind and that we are all equal.

I was a curious bright happy child, always reading, always learning, always interested in the way things worked, what life is about, what happens when we die, what is God and why are we here. 

I was born on May 2, 1968 in Presque Isle Maine. I'm a twin - fraternal - Lisa & Lori. I have a one-year younger sister named Leslie. I had a happy childhood and teenage years growing up in Tilton, New Hampshire but I knew that I wanted to see the world and get out of the small town when I graduated high school. 

My very first introduction to metaphysics was Shakti Gawain's book "Living In The Light" in 1986 when I was 18. That book had a profound effect on me - and got me interested in psychology and also introduced me to Eastern mystical traditions from India which I'd never heard about growing up.

All of a sudden I was learning about Buddism, Hinduism, about Shiva, Shakti and Vishnu, about energies not visible to the human senses, about creative visualization and listening to inner guidance. And it was the first time I heard the word "consciousness"  - so that book was opening me up to a whole world of ideas that I didn't know existed. I felt excited by all of it - that there was some kind of a power or presence that we all had access to, that was available to everyone - and that we could use our thoughts to create a life we love. 

My second introduction to these “way out there” ideas was Wayne Dyer "You'll See it When You Believe it" in 1989 when I was 21.

That one really blew my mind. The idea that the world "out there" isn't actually "out there" at all - it isn't solid or physical. It says that the body and the world and other people are nothing more than holographic reflection of light that is mirroring our inner thoughts and beliefs. What??? I was definitely interested! 

These ideas set me on a path to find out for myself if this was actually true: Do our thoughts create our reality? How does it work?

Back then I was constantly trying to improve my life and the way I did it was with positivity, positive affirmations, law of attraction, being a good person, thinking about what I want and “acting as if” I had it already.

I was on the self-improvement bandwagon!

I often got what I wanted: a great relationship, friends, money, an amazing job in publishing in NYC, a sunny and bright one-bedroom apartment in Park Slope Brooklyn on a tree-lined street with brownstone buildings that was one block from Prospect Park – everything in my life was storybook picture perfect - but I noticed that even though I was able to attract what I wanted, I still was living in a state of uncertainty and overwhelm.

I always felt like I could lose it all in any minute.

It was a constant feeling that I had to work hard to hold it together – the job, the relationship, the money, the great apartment. I felt like I couldn’t relax my guard or else it would all fall apart. And that’s exactly what did happen: It all fell apart. First the relationship, then the great apartment and a couple of years later, I lost the job and the money.

I grew up in a small town in New Hampshire with a love of books, a love of food, a love of animals, a love of people ... and a curiosity about the "invisible" realm.

I had a lot of metaphysical experience as a child where I would leave my body at night, see the Lisa body laying there in bed and I would travel outside the body, outside the house. I was this gelatinous blob that was still aware and intelligent even though I wasn't in the body anymore. It was all very normal to me until my parents started commenting on my weird behavior at night - lol - and there was talk they were going to take me to a doctor. That was it. I shut it all down and I started staying in the body.

Behaving. Being a good girl. Playing by the rules. Being quiet.

I had a great childhood and a happy high school experience.

In the third grade I was bullied by one girl who told me I was stupid and that no one liked me and response was to be as invisible as I possibly could. I went from being an enthusiastic happy bright child to doing everything possible to blend in and make people like me.

I learned early on in grade school how “to make friends and influence people” by making them feel good and praising them and that become a big part of my personality. People liked having me around.

In high school, a girl named Danna Bare showed up at our high school from California with a shaved head, rocking her most authentic brilliant self and she was a cosmic bright star inserted into my timeline that showed me that I could be myself.

For several years, I stopped caring what people thought about me. I no longer tried to be invisible. I wore clothes I loved, which at that time was mostly influenced by Belinda Carlisle of the Go-Go’s and Madonna. I shaved my head. I was back to being my brilliant bright happy self again during my high school years.

I went to two colleges - Champlain College in Burlington Vermont in 1986 and got a degree in hotel/restaurant management and then I went to Florida Atlantic University in Boca Raton Florida in January 1989 and I got a degree in journalism and communication. I loved those years and the experiences I had in both places. I had many friends. Boyfriends. I went to classes. I worked various jobs to pay for tuition and living expenses and I loved life.

When I graduated from FAU, I moved back to New Hampshire, met an awesome guy and we moved to NYC in 1992 and that’s when I got a job in publishing in Manhattan.


I absolutely loved living in New York. I loved going into the city every day, working in publishing in the 90s. I love one-hour lunch breaks to explore bookstores and parks and walk around. I loved being in a relationship. I loved weekends in Brooklyn, going to the park, walking around the neighborhood, going to movies, meeting friends for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

But during those years, I started to be aware of a feeling of “this could all fall apart”.

My parents divorced when I was 15 and even though I blew it off like it was nothing at the time they divorced (I was too cool to care) and I started to have this general sense that “nothing lasts, everything comes to an end eventually’

I went from being carefree and spontaneous to feeling like: “Okay, I’m an adult now with a job, a relationship, rent and responsibilities.” 

I started being what I thought the situation required of me. Looking back, I see that I could have continued to be myself, relaxed, happy, enthusiastic, doing what I want, but I was afraid that if I wasn’t the perfect girlfriend and if I wasn’t the perfect employee, always on time, always at my desk, always bringing in money for the company, that someone would be upset with me and express their upset. I wanted everyone to love me. So I went out of my way to be the kind of girlfriend and the kind of employee that could guarantee that no one would ever leave me or fire me.

In the relationship, after a couple of years, we started to drift apart with different interests, but we both held on. We were great friends and loved each other very much but it was becoming clear that we were no longer a fit for each other. Instead of ending it, I think we both were tolerating it, even though it was probably clear to both of us that a breakup was probably for the best. And eventually, that’s what happened. We broke up. It was a mutual decision and we moved out of the great apartment, and even though it was sad for both of us it was a friendly break-up, as good as these things could go.

But after that, I really let myself go. I started to have a “why bother?” attitude. I started drinking heavily at night – vodka tonics and wine - and on the weekends. I moved into an apartment in a not so-great neighbor and once I moved in, I realized there were rats, small rats, but still. That freaked me out. I gained 50 pounds.

I had a job and was making money but there was no money left after paying my bills for the apartment with rats, subway fare, lights, heat, water, food.

I was grateful to have a job and a place to live. But I lived in fear because I knew it could all fall apart … and then what?

It was a mostly dark period, but I put on a happy face around other people. And yes, there were moments of joy – days when I did experience happiness with friends – real joy – but then I would be back by myself in my apartment alone and all I wanted to do was drink vodka tonics, read A Course in Miracles and go to bed.

A Course in Miracles made me feel a glimmer of hope. It talked about miracles, healing, happiness, peace, God and Jesus.

It guaranteed perfect happiness and perfect peace.

Somewhere, deep down, I knew it was possible.

The book also talked a lot about healing and that fascinated me. It said that all sickness was of the mind and that healing and health happens with a decision for wholeness and oneness, to be our true Self.

A lot of it I didn’t understand at the time but I still felt myself drawn to the book every day.

I was still only in my 20s. Was this my life?

Yes, I had a job but I still had no money because it all went to bills and rent.

I was still reading A Course in Miracles and didn’t know a single other person who had ever heard of it. This was like 1997.

I was still drinking vodka every day and bottles of red wine. And martinis with olives. I thought of myself as a sophisticated New York girl, working in publishing. I bought expensive fancy glassware and only drank top-shelf liquor. But nothing could have been further from the truth. I was not sophisticated. I was an alcoholic with a drinking and thinking problem.

I was at a point where I wanted something new to happen in my life, but I had no idea how to make a change.

I searched the New York Times job ads in the Sunday Times each week, searching for a job that would change my life, but everything I saw looked like it was be the same job as the one I had now, just different scenery, different office, different people. But same old, same old.

I wanted a purpose, a life, something exciting, something meaningful.

I wrote all about this in my book Gorgeous for God - when on July 4, 2000, I stood in living room in Brooklyn New York and said: God, I'm all yours.

If you're there. I'm all yours.

A lot began changing after that.

I didn't even believe in God. But I didn't know where else to turn. I didn't know what else to do.

Six days later on July 10th, I lost my publishing job due to the company being bought out by some other company.

I got fired by people I didn’t even know, who were working out of some office in like Virginia. I thought that was funny.

It was shocking but also exciting. I thought: Okay. Okey-doke. I declare my life belongs to God and I lose my job six days later.

I was told to leave immediately and was able to collect 6 months of unemployment pay. I also cashed out my 401K, which wasn’t a ton of money but it allowed me to continue to live in New York and pay New York prices.

The very first thing I did was buy a computer. I had been using a company computer and when I no longer had access to a computer, I knew I needed one.

I was working for God!

My thought was that I would dedicate my life to A Course in Miracles, do exactly what it instructs and write about it.

I left New York in March 2001 and moved to an academy in Wisconsin for A Course in Miracles called Endeavor Academy. It was supposed to just be a 30 day retreat, but I knew on my first day there and I would move there and I was there until 2010. There were 250 of us there and I loved it. 

Alcoholism and cigarette smoking fell away the instant I arrived - March 2001 - and has never returned.

I was feeling happier than before, but I was still overwhelmed. I was sober and I'm grateful for that but I still was experiencing constant fear, anger and self-doubt.

Mostly the feeling and thought was that "I'm doing something wrong."

I felt powerless.

i was reading in A Course in Miracles that "I'm not a body" but I sure felt like one! It sure seemed like this body was real! 

Back then my practice was asking God, Jesus and Holy Spirit for help - and mostly I felt my requests for help and happiness were going unanswered.

I thought I was being tested and held back by God. No joke.

It's funny to me now that I believed so strongly in a power outside of me, but the struggle was real!

I was doing all these spiritual practices, doing everything I thought I needed to do to "wake up" to my true nature - to be in peace and happiness - and nothing ever seemed to change. I was being kind and loving. I was doing constant forgiveness work: forgiving everyone and everything. I was seeing everyone as myself. I had dedicated my life to God in 2000. I wanted to be a light in this world and to serve, shine, give, help and inspire. I kept saying "Here I am! I'm all yours!" and I was still me. No angels or light or voice was showing up, which is what I was expecting.

I laugh now because it's all so clear to me - I was identified with the seeker which is the false body-self - but at the time it was not clear at all.

In 2013, I got sick with flu-like symptoms and pain and that went on for years. It was eventually diagnosed as "an incurable autoimmune disease" which no treatment or method could cure. I tried everything. I spent over $20,000 trying various things to heal - traditional, conventional, alternative & spiritual. I read every book on healing. I worked hard at changing all my limiting beliefs to ideas of truth. I meditated, did positive affirmations and "acted as if" what I wanted was mine.

I felt that if I could just "change my mind" then the body would change, the world would change and my life would change.

I was super confused.

I was on a mission to crack the code on healing and failing completely.

But I couldn't give up. I knew happiness, health and healing was available to me and to everyone.

I told myself that I was already healed, whole and perfect.

I did "healthy" diets trying to heal (gluten free, vegetarian, vegan, clean, no processed, no packaged, no dairy, no sugar, all organic, local and fresh), took supplements and antibiotics, went to doctors and naturopaths, said affirmations.

Then I went the "I need do nothing" route, which was still me trying to heal. Trying to do nothing to heal is doing something. lol.

I was so desperate to emerge from chronic pain, conflict and physical symptoms.

I would have momentary relief at times, but I wasn't healing. I wasn't getting any better.

In October 2018, my husband Bill Free asked me if I could "welcome" the pain and physical symptoms.

This was a turning point for me.

Up until then I had been fighting, resisting, trying, doing. Inside, there was an inner battle and that was the real sickness! That's what needed healing.

Starting in 2018, I began to learn about Advaita Vedanta and non-duality. My first exposure to these ideas was Rupert Spira and Francis Lucille - and I was very excited by what I was reading and hearing! I started to learn that Consciousness and Awareness is our true nature.

Then I went directly to their teachers: Jean Klein and Atmananda Krishna Menon.

Those teachings are the basis of everything I teach now.

I resonated with these teachers because of how DOWN-TO-EARTH they are, using the body and mind to know the Self.

With the welcoming idea and non-duality teachings from Jean Klein and Atmananda Krishna Menon everything began to change in my life - healing occurred - and now I share this with others. .

There is no such thing as "healing yourself" because the self that wants healing isn't real.

But you can allow healing to occur.

Healing happens naturally when you stop fighting yourself.

I absolutely love A Course in Miracles and I still teach some of the ideas from it but I have mostly moved away from the Christian language contained within A Course in Miracles (Son, Son of God, Christ, He, Him, Holy Spirit) with the understanding that God = Consciousness = Awareness = our true Identity = Infinite Being = the changeless Self = Presence = I.

Healing is not something you "do'
Health and happiness is what you are.

Healing (and awakening!) occurs naturally when you stop fighting & resisting what is showing up in your life.

There was never a grand awakening for me, no bells or whistles.

Healing and awakening was a slow and gradual "process" that came about from the recognition that Awareness - pure Presence - is what we are, our shared identity.

And needs no healing!

The only thing that needs healing is the belief that you are a body, limited, weak, frail and powerless.

You are definitely not powerless!

My approach is down-to-earth, practical and simple because just saying "I am pure consciousness" and "I'm not a body" never worked for me. It was too abstract, too conceptual.

In my own healing, I needed to work with the mind and body -investigating and inquiring into inner thoughts, beliefs, emotions and habits - and slowly & gradually things began to change.

Therefore my approach works with the body and emotions. The way I teach about healing begin with the "false" self" - with the "you" that you believe is you - until the realization and recognition of consciousness as the Self as What You Are is your living reality